{"id":124,"date":"2011-09-28T07:46:04","date_gmt":"2011-09-28T13:46:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.angrygames.com\/?p=124"},"modified":"2011-09-28T07:58:15","modified_gmt":"2011-09-28T13:58:15","slug":"capture-at-the-hive","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.angrygames.com\/?p=124","title":{"rendered":"Capture At The Hive"},"content":{"rendered":"<p align=\"center\"><strong><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Capture at the Hive<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>\u201cEric!\u201d his mother screamed from the bottom of the stairs.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s <strong><em>MEGATRON!!!<\/em><\/strong>\u201d Eric\u2019s yell came back from his open bedroom doorway.<\/p>\n<p>Mom sighed. \u201cOkay\u2026Megatron William Goldman, get your <strong><em>ASS<\/em><\/strong> down these stairs. <strong><em>NOW!<\/em><\/strong>\u201d<!--more--><\/p>\n<p>Megatron, in the full formal battle dress of the Galactic Republic, arrived at the stairs. The evil Queen Mother at the bottom glared at him, saliva dripping from her gigantic fangs, bits of human flesh lodged between her massive, razor-sharp claws.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI, General Megatron, only take orders from the Galactic President! Name, rank, and serial number is all you\u2019ll get out of me!\u201d Eric put his wrists together as if to give himself up willingly to the evil Queen Mother so she could hobble him with laser handcuffs, preventing him from using his utility belt to attempt an escape.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cListen up, defender of the galaxy\u2014\u201c Mom said in a low voice, through gritted teeth.<\/p>\n<p>\u201c<strong><em>UNIVERSE!<\/em><\/strong>\u201d Megatron shouted defiantly, struggling against the invisible minions that were under her mind-wash power.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhatever,\u201d she continued, \u201chow about defending the kitchen from the overflowing garbage can?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cA simple task,\u201d Megatron said with distaste. \u201cToo simple for the Defender of the Universe. Do you not see the greatness that is General Megatron?\u201d he asked, pointing (with wrists still bound by the laser handcuffs) to the construction paper medals pinned to the chest of his uniform.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhen you are done <em>\u2018defending\u2019<\/em> the garbage, how about exterminating the dirty aliens strewn all over your room? Captain Megalon\u2019s troops would toss him out the airlock if they knew about the dirty underwear everywhere up there in his cabin,\u201d she stated with a good deal of sarcasm.<\/p>\n<p>\u201c<strong><em>GENERAL<\/em><\/strong> Mega-<strong><em>TRON!<\/em><\/strong>\u201d he wailed at her two-pronged insult attack.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell, it\u2019s a pigsty in there kiddo!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThis is an insult to my station! I\u2019m the hero that saved colonists on Alpha-9! I\u2019m the one whose heroic actions helped avert the slaughter of millions of innocents on Tau Ceti! This is\u2014\u201c<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThis is me paddling your ass with extreme prejudice!\u201d the evil Queen Mother shouted in a dangerous voice, full of finality, grabbing him by the shoulder and forced-marching him to the Hive\u2019s bleak, pitch-black dungeon where the trash awaited.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLet it be known that I hereby vow to avenge, or be avenged of this insult!\u201d Megatron said, back to his defiant prisoner-of-war tone as he pulled the nearly overflowing trash bag from the can.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Capture at the Hive \u201cEric!\u201d his mother screamed from the bottom of the stairs. \u201cIt\u2019s MEGATRON!!!\u201d Eric\u2019s yell came back from his open bedroom doorway. Mom sighed. \u201cOkay\u2026Megatron William Goldman, get your ASS down these stairs. NOW!\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[5],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.angrygames.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/124"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.angrygames.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.angrygames.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.angrygames.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.angrygames.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=124"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/www.angrygames.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/124\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":127,"href":"https:\/\/www.angrygames.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/124\/revisions\/127"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.angrygames.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=124"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.angrygames.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=124"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.angrygames.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=124"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}